Two Handed circle

Too many people in the world, unfortunately some Orthodox Christians included, think that marriage is a contract.

The Orthodox Mystery of Matrimony and the basis of the Holy Mystery turn this idea on its head.

It should be reinforced that the traditional Orthodox wedding service does not include wedding vows, because marriage is a sacrament not a contract.

In our service books there is an ambiguous footnote stating that these vows are not used in all churches. We know the history, Ukrainians under Polish Lithuanian rule were forced to put wedding vows in the service, as to not do so in the eyes of their rulers meant that the children of their realm, the Polish Lithuanian kingdom - or the Austro Hungarian, were not seen as legitimate in their eyes. This is ignoring centuries old teachings of the faith.

And so to the current day we keep them, but we exercise the right to use them or leave them out all together. They are not the basis of the mystery.

One of the basic Christian truths of the marital life is that there are three people in the marriage, The husband - the wife and God, and for the whole union to be successful, it has to always remain these three only. Throughout this holy mystery we are shown this in the service.

There is one subtle part of the service towards the end, just before the priest gives the dismissal, where we see this actualised in one of the final prayers that the priest says over the newly crowned and wedded couple.

“ May the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit of the All Holy Consubstantial life-giving Trinity One Godhead and one kingdom, bless you, and grant your length of days, fair children, progress in life and faith, and fill you with all earthly good things and make you worthy to enjoy the good things of the promise through the prayers of the Theotokos and all the Saints amen.”

While the priest is saying this prayer, the couple face each other, they join their heads together, and join their hands in a two handed circle, the priest places his epitrahelion over both heads just as he would do in the holy mystery of confession. This illustrates best how they should always be, a two handed circle focused on each other, not letting anything else in, only God in the middle.

Fr Michael